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Evolving the leader withinJohn Demartini is a world-renowned behavioural specialist who has written a number of books on the subject and is regularly appearing on The Oprah Winfrey Show, among many others. In short, he is a man who is highly regarded for his insights on the human condition.
I have always regarded behavioural specialists/life coaches/mentors etc. with a healthy dose of scepticism, since I have ingrained in me the notion that life is not meant to be easy. I state this upfront, as one has to account for one’s prejudices when conducting an interview, and I would be less than truthful if I did not admit to a modicum of cynicism in relation to this field of expertise.
I am always wary of individuals who feel they have a calling that amounts to them telling everyone else how they should be living.
In the interests of journalistic integrity, I have related apprehension with regard to the interview, but I do have the ability to be proven wrong and, as is so often the case with prejudice, this is what transpired.
We did not get off to a good start, since the interview time was delayed at the last minute and I was mildly peeved by this.
I was startled out of my torpor by Clarissa Judd, who heads up the Demartini Institute in South Africa.
Another interview had overrun and the inconvenience was soon forgotten when I caught the end of it. I don’t know for which media outlet the interviewer worked, but “simpering” would be too subtle a word to describe her demeanour in Demartini’s presence. The reverence Judd displayed was that of the devotee – akin to the devotion reserved for a demigod. I was filled with a mixture of awe and revulsion.
Demartini has a beatific presence and a very alert but calm awareness. He is extremely assured in all he says and does. He is obviously very intelligent and well-read, although his claim of having read 29 000 books left me doing some staggering calculations – either he reads like a whirlwind or he has no social life!
He is so convincing in his delivery that he can be forgiven the salesman’s hyperbole. In fact, many of the anecdotes and ideals that he expanded upon left him visibly moved during our conversation, so convincing was he!
These are the details of this extraordinary interview:
Is leadership not an innate quality – you either have it or you do not?
No, because there is no question in my mind that you can awaken leadership in people.
Some awaken it at a young age and they are classified as innate leaders. Some awaken it later, and there are distinct differences between people who awaken it at different ages.
To elaborate on this: No matter what age, religion, gender etc. that you are, as an individual we each have a set of priorities in life, which is evolving right through our life. As a child between one and 10, you may want to play. Between 10 and 20, you may want to socialise. Twenty to 30, it may be build a career and get married.
Each, from the most important to the least, we call the “priority list”. What is at the top of the list, the highest priority, the Ancient Greeks called the Telos – the end in mind. That is something that no one has to get you up in the morning to do – you are inspired from within to do that. Whatever is highest on the list is where people are ordered, disciplined, focused etc. Their identity revolves around that.
Some people are rewarded for pursuing what they are inspired to do while others are discouraged from fulfilling their values. Some are trained to start doubting themselves and their values, and they subordinate their leadership in the area of their highest values.
I take someone who has been classified as a follower and find out what their values are.
I show them how to set goals and intentions that are aligned with that and reduce them to manageable bites that prevent inertia from setting in and allow momentum to build, step by step. Once you understand how values are shifted by our perception of supports and challenges, you can do it artificially.
I have developed a methodology whereby we take people who already are leaders and identify traits of those leaders they admire.
We found out where they have those traits in their life and it is always in the area of their highest values – but they haven’t found that out because they keep comparing themselves to others who have those traits in other areas of their life and they keep thinking that somehow there’s something wrong with theirs.
They admire these traits in others when they don’t realise they already have them, although it’s in a form they are not honouring. They are suppressing their leadership.
When I have them do the exercise and own the trait, we help them identify their highest values and show them how to develop the traits they already have.
The key to all this is educating people on what their goals and values are; how to set goals that are congruent. Educating people that you must have service and reward to obtain fulfilment. Educating people that you must contribute in the economic game. This is essential in narrowing the margin between the haves and the have-nots and creating a stable economy in this (or any) country.
In a sense, is the world not more stable when you have more followers than leaders?
You cannot get the same number at the highest level, but everyone is a follower and a leader to someone. There is a balance between the leaders and followers, but not at the highest level; there are always “the hands of the few”.
Ultimately, the person at the very top – what are they doing? They are following the cultural needs, and the very highest leader has to be dedicated to the many.
You have seven areas of power in every society. Spiritual or religious power – every nation has to have some sort of unifying spiritual system or there’s no harmony. A culture has to have intellectual power based on a system of education. There must be entrepreneurs leading the country in trade.
Countries need family stability and societies need a social structure that promotes a balance of power among people of different means.
Healthcare, military systems and policing need to be in balance for a society to function.
If any of these areas are below world standards, it leads to an increase in the likelihood of plutocracy, aristocracy and dictatorship.
In that regard, how is your work with Lead SA going to address this and impact the life of the man in the street?
Well, if I explain the whole cultural dynamic to the people in charge and how important it is to have a society that benefits all citizens, I contribute in that way.
If I go into the ‘masses’, I contribute by educating people through the media (radio, television, magazines etc). What little contribution I make, I try to do it for both groups.
In your biographical information, it said you struggled with dyslexia as a young man. Do you think those difficulties shaped the person you have become?
When I was seven, I was told (by a teacher through the schools counselling system) that I would never be able to read, write and communicate – that I would never amount to anything or go very far. I believed this until the age of 17 when I met a teacher who, in one hour, inspired me to believe I could transcend this.
That void in my development was essential to making me what I am today.
I have read extensively, written countless volumes and travelled the world communicating with people from all backgrounds, so I would thank that First Grade teacher for creating the void in my life that helped me fulfil my destiny.
I now teach people that lesson: Don’t be a victim of your history, but rather the master of your destiny!
What were you taught at age 17 – what was the epiphany?
I had been extremely ill and thought I was dying, and I remember saying: “If I make it through this, I am going to make something of my life!”
Right after that, a woman came and nursed me back to health and helped me take in liquids – all I could stomach was carrot juice.
At the health food store, I saw a flier for a talk – “special guest speaker, Paul C. Bragg”.
The picture told me there was something about this guy and I decided to go to the talk, which was in a yoga hall.
He stood up and said, “You have something extraordinary in you. You are geniuses, but may not have recognised it. It’s time to set goals for your life and do something with it.”
He had an amazing presence. He taught us Alpha meditation: “Take 10 minutes to think about what you are going to dedicate your life to. Be careful, for whatever you decide tonight is going to become your destiny.” That’s a heavy trip to put on a 17-year old!
I had a vision of speaking in front of a million people, and it was so real that it was more real than the room I was in. I knew at that moment what I was going to do – that was 38 years and three months ago, and I have been focused on that since that day.
At this point, Demartini started to cry. It was a startlingly sincere moment and made me realise the power of his vision and his belief in his work.
We caught ourselves, and he soon launched into a rapid-fire dissertation on quantum physics and chaos theory and how these related to the “Demartini Method” and his “Breakthrough Experience”.
Despite my initial prejudices, I could have carried on talking to Demartini for many hours. I had many other questions, but I did not want to get in the way of his incredible brain and the constant flow of ideas emanating from it.
He has found a way to harness his destiny and make it into a bankable commodity while remaining authentic.
I do not agree with all his conclusions, but I now greatly admire his work.
I leave you with a quote from our discussion, which had a profound impact on me: “Nothing of the sense will ever satisfy the soul, so as you accumulate, you eventually realise that that is just a stage of awareness and not something transcendent, but that is a stage that people have to go through in order to come out on the other side”.
George Joubert
